Why Pray If God Does Not Answer All Our Prayers?
Fr. Brian Dulli
Originally posted on 12/27/2009

As a young kid, I was fascinated by the idea of Aladdin’s lamp. The Genie grants three wishes, any three wishes. Every cartoon also included a helpful moral to the story. Most people get into some kind of trouble because of their three wishes. Genies have phenomenal cosmic powers, but any time that the universe gets changed, mere mortals are left to reckon with the consequences.

In C.S. Lewis’ book, Miracles, he explains how miracles are not inconsistent with nature. Miracles go beyond what is natural, as an intervention of an all-good and all-loving creator. The fictitious genie gives the wisher what he wants, but destroys the natural order of things in the process. As God responds to our requests, whether miraculous or ordinary, he keeps the full system in view. God alone can supersede the natural order and give us what we ask. He alone can create something out of nothing

For example, Jesus Christ cured the blind and the lame who came to him. The blind asked for their sight; Jesus responded by creating sight where there was no sight before. Christ did not have to disrupt the natural order in order to grant this request as vision itself is completely natural. Jesus shows us how God’s creative power can intervene from what is beyond our natural horizon.

The number of people not cured by miraculous events far outweighs the opposite in my experience. There are well known cases of miraculous cures, but I don’t know what it is like to see one before my very eyes. What’s more, God does not appear to grant every prayer of his creatures even in ordinary matters. How many people pray for peace and reconciliation in some matter, only to be left struggling more? What is the overall effect of praying and submitting to God long term? Why should a person even begin the life of prayer when it all borders on wishful thinking?

The only times Jesus refused to perform a miracle in the New Testament were those when the people didn’t really need anything. In Matthew 16, the Pharisees and Sadducees ask for a sign. Jesus rebukes them for failing to read the sign of the times and says that a wicked and depraved generation seeks a sign. God doesn’t need to prove himself to us. There are signs of his presence in everything if only we learn to see. Prayer that is focused on God helps us, over time, to see the way that God speaks to us. Rather than acting in some specific way that we expect, God is more often speaking to us in ways that we can already understand.

The more a believer prays, the better his overall discernment of life and its signs. Rather than looking for that one thing that God can do, here are some ways to find meaning in life by praying to God.

       • Be grateful- There are many good things that we have to be thankful for. When life is trying, it is even more important to remember to give thanks. This helps us to put our worries and desires in perspective.

       • Speak openly- Prayer helps us not only to talk to God, but to be honest with ourselves. Don’t just ask God for something, but talk about why this is so important now. God has compassion. So then, he cares about our feelings. Acknowledge feelings that may come out while you pray and God will lead you to peace.

       • Be consistent- Our behavior is built up by good habits. To have a good relationship with God, each person needs to have a set time and place for prayer. Keep a consistent length of time. You can begin with 10 minutes and perhaps over time build up to one hour of prayer a day. Have practices with which you are comfortable and that help you to pray, such as vocal prayers like the Our Father or reading from the psalms.

       • Expand your desire- As your trust in God increases, you will find yourself praying for many different people. He cares for each member of our families and for all of the problems of the entire world. Asking God for help is not just for selfish wants or emergencies. Our petitions are as big as the desire for God in our hearts. Our prayers on earth prepare us for the ultimate desire of knowing God forever in heaven.